What Is Sparlock, The New Ex-Witness Meme?

Sparlock the Warrior Wizard is the Watchtower Society’s newest unintended act of shameful hilarity, one that ex-Jehovah’s Witnesses across the net have latched onto and made their own. It is also the product of an organization run by a bunch of clueless old guys who are probably still complaining about the kids with their Walkmans and those new-fangled airplanes and such. For ex-Witnesses who feel that the Society exists in a Twilight Zone bubble of creepiness, Sparlock could surely serve as our exhibit A.

Sparlock is awesome, even if the video that spread the name is not. If you haven’t seen it yet, the video appears below.

UPDATE: “The man” has dropped the hammer on this video, crushing poor little Sparlock like so many of Caleb’s hopes and dreams. Another version has appeared, and another, and still another, but they will surely go away before many of you can see it. You can get more in the way of details on the actual video at Watchtower’s New “Toy Story” – What Parents Need To Know thanks to Cedars. Check out the rest of his blog while you’re there.

That was part 2. The first part is also on YouTube, and is just as depressing. Not to mention manipulative. But I digress. Remember kids, the Society actually put this video out there for Jehovah’s Witnesses–and all their critics–to see. They spent real money on this turd, went through some sort of editorial process to write it, tweak it, and bring it to life, then produced thousands of DVDs and spread them far and wide, all without realizing just how bizarre and creepifying it would be for those of us who do not exist within their stifling bubble of disjointed magazine covers and old guys in black suits.

Continue reading