Review: Tron Legacy

tron legacy siren posterThe reviews for Tron Legacy were pretty mixed, so I wasn’t sure if I wanted to see it in the theater or not. After reading this review at my beloved IO9, I almost didn’t see it at all. Yet there were reviews like this one, too. (The title didn’t piss me off at all, BTW.) Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes both gave Tron Legacy slightly less than 50% approval ratings. So I was all, like, “I dunno, man. Maybe I’ll just wait for the DVD.” But I had been off from work for a few days and being indoors makes my migraines go all nasty on me. Not the good kind of nasty, either. So when my wife expressed an interest to see Tron Legacy, I knew it was time to get in the car and drive.

So, of all the reviews for the movie, who was right? Did Tron Legacy shame it’s predecessor or not?

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Am I The Only One Who Thinks The Movie “Avatar” Sucked?

I wanted to write a review of Avatar when I first saw it, but found it so bland and predictable that it wasn’t even worth making fun of at the time. It just felt too much like work to bother, ya know? Then, seeing that a newer, even longer, extra-skippy edition of Avatar is about to be released, I felt someone had to take a stand. Why not me? Consider it a public service announcement for all 8 people who haven’t seen the movie at least twice already. I also saw a rating for it on one of those movie channels I get with my Comcast subscription. It gave Avatar 3 1/2 out of 4 stars. They gave each of the Lord of the Rings movies the same exact rating, if that puts things into perspective for you. Well, I call bullshit on them.

Dudes … seriously … am I really the only who thinks Avatar sucked total rooster balls1? Just in case, I thought I’d tear the movie a new one and find out the hard way. So get your hate mail ready. I can take it, America. Just remember: I’m doing this for you.

You’re welcome.

So now, I ask you: am I really the only one who thinks the movie Avatar sucked big time?

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  1. KFC’s worst addition to their children’s menu ever. Well, maybe.

Review: Inception

Inception movie poster
DiCaprio’s gonna
need to change
his Huggies if
he stands there
much longer!

Like most of you, I was hooked by the buzz over Inception. Shots of Leonardo DiCaprio talking about entering people’s dreams, dudes fist fighting while floating in air, and buildings colliding over a cool soundtrack made my eyebrows go up. It was all very Matrix-like. Only Inception reminded me of the first Matrix, not the crappy ones that came later. So, despite the lack of a stripper pole or hot leading ladies (Ellen Page looks like an underdeveloped 14 year old to me) I wanted to see it. Hell, even my wife wanted to see it. Then the reviews finally came in from Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes. Both showed that the critics loved it. That put it over the top: we were go for Inception!

So, with the sun just 6 inches from our heads and nothing to protect us from its blistering rays save my beloved Chrysler, we headed off to the movies. All I could do was hope that it was worth it. Well, I was also hoping the car’s air conditioner would cope with the 5,000 degree heat. But that’s beside the point.

Bet I know what you’re thinking. Was Inception worth the sweltering heat, or did it suck like that family get together at the state prison last year?

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Behold! The Atheist Geek Reviews … Watchmen!

watchmen posterLike any atheist geek worth his salt, I used to be a big comic book nerd back in the ’80s. But I had never read the Watchmen comics or (::gasp::) even heard of them. Maybe that’s because I was into Marvel comics instead of DC. Or because my home town sucked and we never got anything that was really “cool” by my standards. I could never get my hands on the Secret Wars comics back then either. Still, I could hardly wait to see Watchmen (the movie) when I saw the previews at the theater. I checked the web sites to see who liked it (the reviewers at Rotten Tomatoes gave it a 65%) and who didn’t (Metacritic gave it 56%, which is pretty average). So I wasn’t sure what I was in for when I went to see it last Saturday.

So was it awesome, or did I leave weeping bitterly and shaking my fist at a cruel, cruel world?

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