I still remember seeing the original Karate Kid at the old drive-in theater with my parents. I was eleven years old and it was a great movie. Little did I know that all the sequels would blow or that, decades later, I would begin seeing advertisements for a remake of the Karate Kid. Shudder.
My reaction to this was probably the same as yours: outright denial. As I wept in my bed that same evening, I dared ignite a single spark of hope. Maybe the new Karate Kid won’t be that bad, I told myself.
Then I went back to thinking about porn like a real man.
My wife and I recently saw the Karate Kid remake on one of those movie channels the kids used to love so much before the Twitter and the iPod. Were my hopes for this movie as pointless as my fantasy about a four-way with the Charmed1 sisters? Or can you safely run your copy of the original Karate Kid through a shredder?
Click the button if you want to find out.
- Actually, I’d throw in Prue and make it a five way. She’s the dead one, in case you didn’t know. Hey, as long as Prue shuts her mouth, she’s more than welcome to my fantasy party! Oh, you gave me that look because you thought she’d still be dead when I was banging her? Weirdo. ↩