Review: “Man of Steel”

Man of SteelWhen I first saw the trailer for Man of Steel, I was hooked. I wanted to see Superman beat the shit out of bad guys and leap into flight for the first time. I wanted to see Kevin Costner fill Clark’s head with homespun wisdom that we all know is bullshit. Most of all, I wanted to see Amy Adams nude. Spoiler warning: no such luck. (Curse you for that, Man of Steel!) Yeah, don’t even pretend you weren’t thinking it. Since the trailer looked so good, I had plans to go see it even before the reviews came in.

I’ve been fooled before. I remember the trailer for The Phantom Menace. It looked awesome, yet part of me died when I saw that movie.

So was a lack of Amy Adams’ nudity my only disappointment with Man of Steel? Excellent question. Click the link to find out.

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Review: “The Dark Knight Rises.”

Dark Knight Rises movie posterNo, it turns out that The Dark Knight Rises is not a porno featuring Anne Hathaway in a fetish costume. Dammit. But it is the latest, and probably last, installment in a series of Batman movies that sucked way less than the ones we got back in the nineties. Oh, and to anyone who thinks Jack Nicholson was a better Joker than Heath Ledger, please stop talking to me. My faith in humanity has been challenged enough without that crap on my mind. Seriously, don’t make me destroy you.

So was the The Dark Knight Rises any good? What’s up with that Bane guy? Did Jim Carrey appear as the Riddler and ruin the whole film with a closeup of his batch? And most importantly, did Anne Hathaway get nude? (Spoiler alert: Disappointed!!!!)

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