Review: Resident Evil: Extinction

You’re probably wondering what Resident Evil: Extinction is like. Well, do you remember those good ol’ Mad Max movies from the eighties? Not to mention the smell of that pig crap they used to make gasoline? Good. Now try real hard to imagine Mel Gibson as a boobless Ukrainian chick. Note that this can most easily be done while watching Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. (So beware!) Got it? Alright. Now imagine that Miss Mad Max is pretty much built from nothing but teeth, hair, and gristle (like your standard Milla Jovovich or Ali Larter type). Then toss her into the world of Day of the Dead (also from the eighties) and give her Jedi powers and you’re all set. You are now channeling Resident Evil: Extinction! Congratulations. What’s that, you say? This movie doesn’t suck as bad as Resident Evil: Apocalypse, but it isn’t as entertaining as the first Resident Evil movie either? Well, now you’re just channeling my opinion of this moderately substandard film. Get out of my miiiiiind!

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Review: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (Episode 1)

The cast

Here it is 1:00 in the morning and I’m writing about Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. So let me jump right in with the good news: it didn’t suck. I’d probably watch it again before Blade: The Series or anything like that. (Anybody wanna ice skate uphill?) I still can’t rate it up there with the likes of Firefly, Farscape, or Heroes, but it managed to hold my attention for an hour. Even better, it looks like the writers are going to play around with time travel and whatnot for us. So if you haven’t seen Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles yet, you might just want to catch one of the millions of re-airings that will surely be happening over the next week or so.

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Review: House! (To M.D. Or Not To M.D.?)

The cast

I’ve only recently discovered House. It’s one of those shows that I’m almost glad I missed during it’s early years. Now, I have a sh*tload of episodes to watch and I don’t have to wait a whole week in between doses. Let me start my review by saying this: No, I don’t wish Dr. House was my dad. (That honor remains with the T-800 and Sauron, Lord of Mordor.) I would be very pleased to have him as a crazy uncle, though. Sort of like Dexter Morgan from Showtime and that series of books. Continue reading